A few years ago, I was coaching a young professional in the early stages of her career. She was bright, ambitious, and ready to make her mark.
One day, she shared a story with me. A senior colleague had pulled her aside and said, “Hey, slow down. Don’t overreach. Stick to what’s safe.”
She told me it felt like they were sharing hard-earned wisdom, and she took it to heart.
So, she started holding back: stopped volunteering for exciting projects, stopped pitching her bold ideas in meetings.
But then, she began noticing a pattern. Those same opportunities she let slip by? That senior colleague was taking them for themselves.
In one of our sessions, she paused and said, “That advice wasn’t about helping me, it was about keeping me in check.” That realization was a turning point for her.
Here’s the learning I helped her embrace:
Never take advice from someone who isn’t genuinely cheering for your success.
But we also worked on the following: don’t close yourself off to constructive feedback from those who do want you to grow.
The key is knowing the difference, real allies challenge you to reach your potential; others, driven by fear or competition, may hold you back.
Let me ask you the same question I asked her: who’s in your corner? Are they lifting you up, or keeping you small?
Best regards,
https://andreasvonderheydt.com